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  • Writer's pictureJoseph Fagarazzi

Acquiring Survival Skill’s From A Violent Past And Moving On!

Updated: Mar 21

Survival in human history always involves suffering and triumph.

Once you understand the format of what is Survival behaviour is, you will stop punishing yourself and will start a new way of healing and building connections.

If raised in abuse “as I was” we can become defensive and possibly abusive ourselves.

As an angry victim, you are in a state of bewilderment not knowing any better you will falsely believe that the way you are raised will turn and form you, into an aggressor.

“Not True”!

I can tell you from my experience, that if there is some kindness and goodness in your heart all that is needed is a strong will to succeed and therefore, this will not be the case for you.

Many victims of abuse end up in prison more often than they should; their belief is to conform to the criteria of doing to others what others have done to them. Admittedly some, but not all are born with an evil tendency and unfortunately for them cannot be helped, but others go astray through no fault of theirs and these lost young souls should be protected and nurtured. 

Their mistrust towards others is caused by inheriting adversity and misery from their own family.

With a combination of grasping at issues and not knowing how to deal with them; their mistrust, anger and hate that boiled up within will sum up to the only thing they know and understand (“Violence” )! This behaviour has now become part of their curriculum and their only survival skills available to them is just that ("Violence".

As parents, family members, friends and acquaintances, we can start by connecting with those who are hurting from the constant neglect and abuse, but the problem is that for those who have never experienced a lifetime of sadness and sorrow, it would be hard to grasp and fathom at their sufferance or….. uplift them with some kind of support, compassion and encouragement. Some and not all , seem to see these kids through tunnel vision, and only perceive them as hooligans and not as victims.

These kids require help, they are in great need of mentorship and understanding in order for them to survive. Help them heal and direct them towards the right path for a better life which can only be achieved with our support ,help and our willingness to try and understand.

We can form a strong bond and a solution for their problematic life.

Joseph Fagarazzi

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